I'm totally chill now

Thank the good lord for small favors... and the goddess too. I got a crink in my neck, pretty bad, couldn't move it - probably stress related. Well you know, I am under quite a bit at the moment even if I do try to laugh it off, which helps. But it doesn't quite pay the bills. Anyway, I had one of those pain pills the dentist gave me for my root canal left over (ok I should have thrown it away a few months ago (Last summer) but I'm never one to waist things that cost an arm and a leg, and a good thing too, that thing loosened up my neck within the hour and I called my ex, to ask if I could possibly hold off sending this months CS for H, and explained why and he was very understanding and said sure and even told me what was wrong with the van (same thing Kenny told me) and how to save a little money when I take it in by asking what parts were needed and going to the auto store and buying the parts myself and having the mechanic install them. Johns cousin Dallas will be the one to work on it this time and John thinks Dallas won't charge me too much. I sure hope not. John is paying for the new tires I need as it is (well he should since he's the primary driver at the moment!)

My mom (bless her) was easy going about the whole thing, I just did not need another person getting upset about something I couldn't have forseen, and it's not as though I'm not trying to find work. I have an application going out almost daily if not more than that. I'm just frustrated. Don't worry people - I'll be my old self in a day or two. Just need to winge - as they say in Australia - now and then.

My son has a terrible summer cold, but it's a bit more than just that because he's been sick to his stomach as well, so he's taken a few days off work which is going to be hurting him. As a parent I of course want to help and I just get angry with myself because I'm unable too. Both my older kids tell me not to get upset, because it's making them tougher as well is more self reliant which I'm glad they have that outlook, but it's KILLING ME! The youngest lives with her dad and she just got her first job so really hasn't had much of an education for making it on her own. She's been the lucky one. (Course the other 2 say she's the 'spoiled' one, but it's all a matter of perspective isn't it?) The real question is this... which ones will be able to have fullfilling lives, stand on their own and know they can make it? I hope all 3, but I'm unsure of the youngest because she's really not ever had to earn the things she's wanted. I love them all more than my own life, I want them to be able to make it in this world and be happy. Success isn't the amount of money you have, it's the people you make into your friends and family along the way. It's how happy you are when you hit 'middle age'. It's how confident you are your whole life.

Toodles.

P.S.
If any of my 3 children just read this - you better know how much I love you guys. And... twice on Sundays.