Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Pies oh Glorious Pies!


Pies oh Glorious Pies!
Originally uploaded by NC Wench.
I had a wonderful Thanksgiving and I hope everyone else did too.

This year we had two Butterball boneless turkeys and they were scrumptious! We watched "March of the Penguins" and "Mr & Mrs Smith" and everyone had a great time and no one argued! WOOOOOOOHOOOOO!

Mr Bush is speaking on my TV right now (CNN) and I feel like I'm sitting in church. Am I the only person to notice how much he sounds like a preacher on a pulpit droning on? Droning in a tone that makes you keep looking at your watch wondering if your gonna get out of church early or on time? He does his little speach spin in such a monatone that you quit listening, only telling us what he wants us to know. Blah Blah Blah and no questions please because I don't like the questions you give me, they're too hard for me to answer. I might slip and tell you the truth.

Just shut the fuck up and get off my television because you aren't telling me anything anyway.

Gawd I can't wait till we get a new President.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

PONDERISMS


Good Morning
Originally uploaded by NC Wench.
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people
die of natural causes.

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are
removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out
of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a
replacement.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Life is sexually transmitted.

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
of nothing.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one
talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention
to criticism.

In the 60's & 70's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world
is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a
whole box to start a campfire?

Never brag about your children, they'll be caught doing something soon enough to make you eat your words.

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come
to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Blogger: Browser Cookies Disabled

Blogger: Browser Cookies Disabled

My cookies work just fine damnit and I am fucking SICK of this error msg! Somedays I can blog somedays I have to take the back way in like I'm doing now! SCREW YOU!

*cough*

Ok alllllll better now.

Here's a cute joke

A Texan is drinking in a New York bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar announcing his wife has produced a typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 pounds.
Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the Texan just shrugs. "That's about average down home, folks....like I said, my boy's a typical Texas baby boy."
Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of "WOW!" We heard one woman actually fainted due to sympathy pains.

Two weeks later he returns to the bar. The bartender says, "Say you're the father of that typical Texas baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth. Everybody's been making bets about how big he'd be in two weeks. So how much does he weigh now?
The pound father answers, "Seventeen pounds". The bartender is puzzled, concerned, and a little suspicious. "What happened? He weighed 25 pounds the day he was born!"
The Texas father takes a slow swig from his long-neck Lone Star beer, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says, "Had'm circumcised"

Texans always think everything in Texas is bigger...mostly it's just thier imaginations that are bigger!

;D

Friday, November 04, 2005

Give 'Em Hell Harry

It's Time To Get Involved!


Hey guys

George Bush needs to lay out the facts about Iraq and his strategy to achieve military, political and economic success to bring our troops home. He needs to know this failure of leadership cannot continue.

Join me and tell George Bush: You can no longer mislead Congress and the American people. It's time for an Iraq success strategy that will bring our troops home. Join me by visiting:

http://giveemhellharry.com/page/petition/iraq
I signed and you should too.

Thanks!

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

BRING THEM HOME!

No more shell games. No more false reports of progress. No more misleading rhetoric about "staying as long as it takes."

It's time for the American people to demand that George W. Bush put forward a clear understandable plan for achieving America's goals in Iraq and bringing the vast majority of our troops home by the end of 2006.

The time is overdue for a plan with a clarity and vision equal to the valor and sacrifices of America's brave armed forces. Help make that kind of plan a reality by supporting our "20,000 troops home over the holidays" campaign. We're kicking off this vitally important initiative with a clear goal - collecting 20,000 signatures a day each and every day until Thanksgiving.

Sign our "20,000 home over the holidays" petition right now:
http://www.johnkerry.com/action/20000

It won't be easy to achieve our goal. But, every day that we gather another 20,000 Americans to our side, we'll be upping the pressure on the Bush administration to come up with the concrete, detailed plan for Iraq that our fighting men and women deserve.